Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Well friends I'm back. I hope you all had some wonderful holidays and a blessed new years! I'm failing horribly at this blogging thing but I think you all can understand a bit that when your soldier comes home from a year and a half of long distance it's a huge thing to adjust to. (More on that later! As an FYI, I'm currently living with Chad at his mom and step dad's house) Plus throwing all the holiday craziness into that mix just makes for some serious lost time on blogging. For that I apologize! I really want to get back into this and make my blog grow though. (Suggestions? Ideas?)  I read through blogs all the time and I'm so interested in everyone else's blogs and I so badly want to get mine to where I see all these other fabulous blogs at but sometimes I get a little lost and loose the motivation. I don't have a wonderfully interesting life, I don't have the most creative writings, I don't have any children to post adorable pictures of, I'm not planning a wedding, I'm not a crazy party girl... I'm just a plain Jane. BUT, I really want to try. Everyone needs a good hobby! Plus if all goes well this year should bring some changes that I'd like to document. Without further-ado, I bring you ...

14 Goals for 2013!

One for goodluck ;)

1. Find a good, reliable job! I need to put some serious effort into finding a decent job that I can count on. While I love serving and the money I bring home there is no way I can survive on not knowing how much to expect every week! Sometimes I make awesome money and sometimes I walk away with $19. Let's be serious... No one can live on $19! I need something I can count on. (And to be quite honest, I miss my retail management job so much lately)

2. Save Save Save! Along with finding a job I can count on, I need to save! Chad and I have made a goal to get our own place at the end of this first semester. So that gives us about 5 months from now to save up for our first place together. We have barely any furniture and really no essential needs for a home of our own plus I'd like to have a couple months of rent saved up. It also never hurts to have a fat savings account $$

3. Let the little things go. I need to put less worry, stress and thought in to things that really aren't that big of a deal. I need to learn to let things go! It's okay to move on and somethings just aren't worth it!

4. Learn to budget!  Budgeting will give me a better sense of what I have and what I can spend. It will also help us immensely when we are on our own. Right now I will admit... We are pretty carefree aside from $1,000 worth of bills every month between the two of us. Plus gas and food expenses. So learning to make a budget and stick to it will really help us to plan and save. I don't want to be living on our own and fall into a rut because we don't know how to budget and save! I really want to be prepared.

5. Do well in school. I don't want to say all A's because I know myself too well and I know that school just has never been my forte. I've never been a straight A student and that's okay! I've accepted it. But I will shoot for A's and B's this semester. I also want to put effort into it.

6. Be Positive! I will admit, that I tend to have a very negative way of thinking. I personally cannot stand it. It drives me absolutely insane so I can only imagine what others around me must be thinking. No one likes a negative Nancy. I want to be able to find the good in everything. I want to look at the positive side of things. I need to make this happen to better myself and my life!

7. Visit my grandmother's grave at least twice this year. I'll admit, I haven't visited since her ashes were buried there. My grandmother was and still is a huge part of me and it kills me to think that I haven't visited. In my defense, it is over an hour away, practically in the middle of no where and it never used to be in the direction I would ever travel. But now that my mother has moved to Maryland it IS an easy stop off. So I'd like to make this happen at least twice, if not more.

8. Spend less time on my iPhone. I know that everyone does it. And I know that it's so natural now a days. But I seriously need to be less dependent on my phone. When I'm bored, I scroll through social networking or play games. This needs to STOP. Sometimes I'll be sitting with family or friends and instead of enjoying my time around them I'm scrolling through my phone. Let's face it there's nothing even that interesting on facebook or instagram! Chad is pretty guilty of this too. A lot more than I am actually. He's included in accomplishing this goal as well.. he just doesn't know it yet.

9. Get Help. I'm gonna get real serious for a minutes..I will tell you right now, I have some serious anxiety issues (along with some depression I suspect.) This is actually a huge part of what stops me from doing serious job pursuing. I have so much anxiety over new things and new jobs is a HUGE part of it. Just thinking about it gets me really nervous. But I cannot and will not let this affect me and keep me from doing new things for my whole life. I don't want to be medicated for these issues, I just want to learn how to cope and how to have more control. I started to see a counselor in September but she was really strange, didn't seem interested in anything I was saying and just didn't make me feel comfortable at all. She was more worried about the rain coming in her bathroom window then talking to me in a paid session. So that scared me off of finding a new counselor. I've been wronged so many times in the past that I have closed myself off to pretty much everyone except for a select few so feeling comfortable in talking to someone is extremely important to me.

10. Make better food choices! I have a pretty decent eating habit. I'm not a HUGE snacker and I'd choose water over soda any day. But sometimes I fall into this slump and will just basically eat my feelings in any food I can get my hands on. (Normally around that time of the month) Which tends to be brownies and ice cream... my weaknesses! I just want to choose the more healthy option and drink less soda or cut it out completely. I tend to drink soda at work because it's there and I can but I really need to knock that off!! I gave up soda for a year once and didn't even miss it so I know that I can live without it! It's really not even that great!

11. Be more mindful of the people you're helping. I have a huge heart and I seriously LOVE to give and love to help people even when I don't have the necessary means to be helping. It's okay to help... and I'm going to continue doing so. But sometimes I find myself helping and giving to the wrong people. People who don't appreciate a thing that I do and who continually use me and wrong me even when I give and put in so much effort. I just need to be more mindful and careful. But I'm going to continue to give and help the people who truly deserve it.

12. Have more confidence in myself. Your mistakes do not define you. Everything that has happened in the past has already happened and cannot be changed. It has shaped me into the person I am today. But I need to let it go and not let it have such an ill effect on my self confidence. I need to love myself for who I am and what I have accomplished. Not what I didn't quite finish or accomplish.

13. Get fit. this is a pretty generic "New Years Resolution" but it seriously needs to happen. It will help me achieve other goals already listed as well. I tend to start working out and loose the motivation when I don't notice any serious body changes. It can't be like this. It takes longer than a couple weeks to see a difference and it's going to take months until others notice it. KEEP GOING. DON'T GIVE UP.

14. BE A BETTER BLOGGER. this is self explanatory! YOU CAN DO IT.